One of my biggest fears is having someone come to me for advice and not being able to give them the advice they need. Or rather, giving them advice but always doubting myself that I could have said more to help them in some way. While people may come to me for advice (with a plethora of topics) some I am not familiar with. Others, I give my opinion on what I would do if I was in that particular situation (making sure I don’t sound bias or I am choosing one side or the other). I always wonder if I am doing enough. I honestly never feel I am until I get validation from them, and I know that may sound bad, but it’s the truth. I think part of me wants to feel like I’ve given them the advice they needed and the confirmation only makes me feel good inside, knowing that they wouldn’t have come to me if they didn’t trust or value my opinion. For me, giving advice means I need to trust myself. I need to remind myself of what I just said, lol, that if someone wasn’t trusting my opinion they wouldn’t have came to me for advice. Articulating as much as I can, because I know that this person is looking for me to help solve their issue, in some way shape or form. I only hope that the advice I have given, and will continue to give will help someone. As crazy as it sounds, while my biggest fear is not saying enough to help someone, there isn’t anything greater than giving advice or even sharing my experiences in a particular situation and that person says I’ve helped them. Knowing that something I’ve said or an experience I’ve shared has helped someone in anyway is a great accomplishment.
To DJ, Thank You for listening and allowing me to share what I’ve been through, and hopefully it’s helped you. You inspired me to write this piece and you’ve taught me that I need to trust myself, and not feel as if I can’t help people. Sometimes the smallest things make a big difference, so I appreciate the conversation we had because without it I wouldn’t have grown more today.