All posts by Jordan

About Jordan

Hey everyone. Thanks for stopping by. I love to read and write. I started this blog to hone my craft of writing and to discuss different topics pertaining to my life! I am self-published, "Pieces of Me: A Collection of Poems and Short Stories." I truly believe writing is an outlet for people to express how they feel, and hopefully when you read what I've written you'll be inspired.

Confession Time

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confession timeSo… I have a confession to make. I have this idea that poetry is supposed to rhyme. People always ask me, “How long have you been writing?” or “What made you write a book?” My answer is always the same. I’ve always loved to read and write ever since I was a child, so it just made sense to me to follow my dreams.

My original plan was to write children’s books, and while that’s still on my many list of things to accomplish I really started to hone in on my poetry and short stories once I got into high school. From there, things just took off for me.

Confession two, whenever I think of poetry I think of some bomb poetry slam/contest/battle. I want to be the person whose writing is so amazing that people don’t always catch the innuendo’s. I just want to be mind blowing when I spit my poetry. I understand that comes with confidence, and putting myself out there more; I’m working on it.

I’ve been reading different poetry books from some amazing authors and one day it hit me. Their writing is so simple but hold it holds so much meaning. I have a tendency to over think and I want things perfect when it comes to my work I equate poetry with big words and double meanings; and things that people have to read over and over to understand.

I’m loving this new space I’m in with my work. I can’t wait to keep sharing on all platforms. I am understanding that my poetry doesn’t have to be long and elaborate, although sometimes it is just because I feel like I haven’t gotten everything out I wanted to say. I’m loving that I’m learning to write shorter and just get to the point, plus, it’ll be easier for me to memorize :). But like Erykah Badu says, “Now keep in mind that I’m an artist and I’m sensitive about my sh*t.”

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the Secret Life of CeeCee Wilkes; First Thoughts Fiction

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the Secret Life of CeeCee Wilkes by Diane Chamberlain is a book that has twists and turns every chapter. In short, this book is about survival, secrets, love and lies. The main character CeeCee Wilkes grows from being a naive, gullible, and care free teen and transforms to a woman who depends on the relationships she’s built to keep a secret that could destroy all she’s worked hard to forget.

This was my first time reading a book by this author, and it won’t be my last. Once I was done reading I immediately found Diane Chamberlain’s website to discover she’s written more turn twisting books that look just as interesting.

the Secret Life of CeeCee Wilkes is about second chances. CeeCee did the best she could with the hand she was dealt, and without giving too much away, she was able to turn the tables and win. There were times she counted herself out but she had an amazing support system that didn’t give up on her even when she felt like giving up on herself.

This book had me in my feelings each chapter. I felt like I was part of the family and I didn’t want anymore destruction to happen to CeeCee even if she was part of the problem. She was a protector, a lover and a survivor. Just imagine being in her shoes… falling in love and having your whole life change because of someone who you trusted whole heartedly.

If you’re looking for a book that will have you on a roller coaster ride this is it. Diane Chamberlain has become one of my favorite authors.

Would you be able to keep a secret for years that would affect your future?

Little Bee; First Thoughts Fiction

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Little Bee by Chris Cleave took me forever to read simply because life got in the way. I had to start it over three times; with the third time being the final charm (pun intended).

Little Bee was about a young Nigerian refugee woman (Little Bee) who was released from her detention center and travels miles away to the only people she knows; the O’Rourke family who saved her life but also tried their hardest to forget the tragic incident of how they met. So I don’t spoil too much, this book I would say has a theme of ‘wanting to be free.’ Every character, small or large is suffering, or going through some type of journey that they only hope keeps them safe and sound on the other side. This book is about second chances. This book is about starting over the best way you know how but being scared (you know what-less) because you don’t know what the outcome will turn out to be.

What I loved about this book was each chapter alternated between Little Bee and Sarah’s (the wife in the story) perspective. Little Bee’s perspective was about survival, never forgetting where she came from, and trying her hardest to re-create herself in a world she really had no business being part of. Little Bee studied how people in England carried themselves because she thought that would be the key to saving her life. She felt like changing her vernacular and knowing facts about a world she would’ve never been placed in if it wasn’t that day on the beach with Sarah was her out. Her way of being free and starting over.

For Sarah, she too was about surviving but in the sense of, she had to focus on the present and not go back to who she was. A woman who was lost and just seemed to go through the motions. Essentially, she was changing for the better but still held on to who she used to be. Sarah was a people pleaser, but failed to focus on how to properly love, balance, and care for her family. It was like she was in denial about things and she knew it but she didn’t take the steps to figure out how to get out of those moments. So she went about her daily routine, struggling because she never spoke up until it was too late; but redeeming herself when Little Bee came back into her life was her way of being free. Helping someone else was they key for her life to be better.

Little Bee and Sarah are one in the same, and it’s crazy because their lives were totally different prior to when they were put together and it changed everything. Their willingness to help one another in a time of turmoil, both physically, and globally shaped who they became as women. They depended on each other and I think subconsciously knew that with all the secrets they kept they needed each other because one couldn’t survive without the other.

Chris Cleave also has another book,  entitled Incendiary. I enjoyed his style of writing  in Little Bee and hopefully you will too. Although it was a slow read in the beginning the relationships the characters developed with each other continuously peaked my interest. Each chapter there was something I wasn’t expecting. A story of two women trying to survive in a world they felt like they didn’t belong too.

 

 

My Motivators!

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Hey ya’ll! I know it’s been a minute, so please forgive me. I’ve been dealing with some writers block, and now I’m here to tell ya’ll how GREAT ya’ll are! Yes Yes! This post is dedicated to all my MOTIVATORS.

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*I wish I had real confetti coming from the screen, so just pretend this is the Happy Birthday Confetti that falls from the top of your I-phone when you send someone a ‘Happy Birthday’ text*

Ya’ll push me to be my best and some of ya’ll I don’t even know on a personal level. If you’re still confused as to who ya’ll are, it’s you. It’s the people that hustle, and grind to reach a goal or a dream they have no matter what. It’s the people that constantly support me and push me to be a better me! I will try to shout out every person I can think of that pushes me to be my best, and if you aren’t mentioned don’t take it personal. I am not only shouting out the people who I know, talk to on a regular basis, went to school with, or never met; I’m also hoping this post will help those who need that extra drive because you simply aren’t motivated to GET UP OFF YOUR FEET AND GET MOVING! Don’t get discouraged. You can be that person! You should have a select group of friends or family, someone that knows you that helps you be better in one way shape or form. Someone with drive that you want to learn to have. Someone that is an entrepreneur, a go-getter.

I appreciate my motivators because it’s hard to be an adult. Life is hard, but ya’ll know the saying ‘nothing worth having comes easy’ and if that isn’t the truth I don’t know what is. Trust me when I tell you I am talking to myself here too. I get discouraged, stressed, over-whelmed, and anxious, super easy but I have to remember things will be okay and I have people in my corner always routing for me! I am my biggest cheerleader and my worst enemy sometimes!

First..

To my Mother and my Sisters, I thank you for your continuous love and support as I’ve grown up and come into my own. All three of you are super moms! Mom, you’ve raised three children and have done an OUTSTANDING job. Karae and Monique, I’ve always looked up to you and even see you as two extra mothers. Now that I am older,  I can appreciate the wisdom and guidance you two have given me compared to when I was younger I just saw it as annoying. Sometimes I still do, I’m working on it! You all know how I am stubborn and don’t like being told what to do if I’ve already made up my mind about something.

Dad, Thank you for being the dad I always wanted. You have raised me with mom like your own. I love you and appreciate everything you do for me. I thank you for being a great example for me for my future children, I know you’ll be an amazing Papa to them. Most importantly, thank you for bringing my mother happiness!

To Olivia, It’s us til the end best friend. You’re always in my corner, making sure I take my  time with things and trying to calm my crazy. You motivate me and make sure I don’t freak out about literally everything. Thank you for your being you. You are truly an amazing person. You’ve gotten your masters and I couldn’t be more proud of you. I know when I finally receive mine you’ll be there to cheer me on!

Kela, You are just a ray of sunshine my Piesecrie! Did I take it back or what! You are always praying for me, and I love you for that. I thank you for always putting a smile on my face and keeping me grounded.

Aza, You’re magical. Our friendship is near and dear to my heart. You know I’m always only a call away. I appreciate your whole life lol and your voice is something special. I am thankful to have met you when I did. Your daughter is going to be amazing. I am proud of you always. I love you and baby Bells.

Tia, We haven’t even known each other long but I appreciate you more than you know! You’re kind, patient, and always willing to help me. I can’t believe we are both published authors! Isn’t it amazing how God places people in the right place at the right time! We’ll be on somebody’s talk show one day! lol

Danni, You’re practically at the finish line to have your dream job! Nurse Danni has a ring to it! You’ve stepped out on faith with your career and that is amazing to me! That gives me strength to never give up and keep pursuing my dream. Our friendship I cherish dearly. You are so strong and I am glad to have you in my life.

Amber, Your drive is something crazy! You’re always thinking of ways to be better and make your brands better! You inspire me to build more on my blog and so many other ideas I have floating around in my head. I wish I had your confidence, but I’m working on it! Thank you for always helping me when needed and never making me feel like I’m over stepping my boundaries.

Tiffany, Tracey, & Ashley, I am so proud of all three of you! Tiffany, I know your sisters and I graduated together but to see three people I grew up with become doctors is literally mind blowing! Ya’ll are truly black girl magic! The fields you all have entered will never die and I know ya’ll are going to rock it! Tracey and Ashley! Columbia just produces greatness, we’re the best class of course! I couldn’t be more proud of you too! Thank you to the three of you for being an example for me to never give up!

Maui, I have been following you for a few months and your personality is the bomb! I love the fact that you take the time to respond to all your fans and I can’t wait to meet you one day! You inspire me because you are famous in my head already lol, and I just feel like whenever we do meet you’re going to know it’s me because I comment on everything you write lol. I seriously appreciate the time you take to help me with any poetry related question, or even responding to my own personal posts. You literally make my day when I see your name pop up on anything I do. I wish you nothing but continued success, and wether I come to Philly or you come to Virginia I know it’s going to be magical!

Lisa, I’ve known you forever lol but I know I can always count on you. You will forever by my bunny. Our friendship is special to me and I appreciate you. You are always down for a prayer, and that year we went to church together was amazing. I love you. Your spirit is unmatched. We have grown over the years and I am so thankful to still have you as one of the few friends from high school. Keep doing amazing things in your field, you’re necessary. Never let anyone tell you different!

Rina, Cousin my cousin. I love your whole life. You are always thinking on the positive side, something I need to work on more. I miss you, but I know your life in Cali will be what you need! I want to thank you for being a great friend in the few years I’ve known you. We have gotten close over the years and I know I can always count on you for a laugh. Your a passionate person and you’re so caring, I know you’re going to do great things.. duh, because we’re family! lol

Yana, I thank you for always making sure I am good. Your laugh is contagious and I love it! You always tell me how much I inspire you and that means so much to me. I love you. I want you to keep writing and keep honing your other crafts! You know I’m always here to support you just like you support me!

Shar, Thank you for being you. I love this new writing journey your on. I tell you all the time your post make me want to write more. So this time I’m returning the favor. You truly are an inspiration and I am glad to have formed a relationship with you. I know your writing is only going to get better and I can’t wait to travel to all the places you’ve been! I thank you for our friendship, the little we’ve shared I cherish because it was genuine.

Imani, I have only known  you for a few months but you’ve helped me with so much. I appreciate you because you’re honest with me all the time. I love the memories we’ve created and I know I can always trust you for a good prayer session. You are going to do great things as a doctor. Finish up your degree because the world is going to need you! I am thankful to have met you when I did!

Bri, It’s crazy because we’ve never met but I feel like I’ve known you forever. You’re so sweet and you always find a way to make sure I see things differently even if I don’t want too. You’re a crazy talented musician and I know that when you graduate with your masters you know I will be so happy for you! You work hard, and you never give up! You’re always so positive with things, even when sometimes things may not be going your way. I love you sis. I am thankful for our friendship and I can’t wait to see what great things unfold for your life!

Domo, It’s amazing to me that you and I have known each other for a while, but we recently have gotten close over the years. I am thankful for your our relationship and how it’s grown because you are always so sweet, kind, and you’re a great listening ear. I love that you always take the time to check in on me. I tell you all the time that I am happy you found true love and that you give me hope. You are an example of our generation. I am blessed to have you in my life. You always make sure to keep me motivated and remembering that God is going to place me in the right direction.

Cobe, Twin! You are so special to me! I am thankful for you because you always put a smile on my face. I love your voice and your personality. I appreciate you because you are genuine and you always positive. I look to you for support because you tell me what I need to hear not what you think I should hear. I thank you for everything you’ve done for me and being a listening ear.

Shaheed, Man, you’re just a chill person! I thank you for being one of the first few people I’ve ever shared my poetry with that wasn’t another woman. I thank you for always being honest with me and making me laugh lol. You teach me to be less mean lol. I thank you for always listening to me and never judging me. It’s funny, you’re the only male friend I have to motivate me but you’re special to me for that reason. You know what our relationship means to me Sha, I thank you for being someone I can always talk too.

To all my motivators, listed or not I appreciate you! You push me to do better and be better everyday! I can only hope I do the same for you!

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To anyone reading this, I hope it’s helped you see that there are people in your corner, and know even if you feel like you have no one you always have God, and ME, and that’s real. 

 

To The Regina Georges Of The World…

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So….mean girls by definition to me..are sad. Not sad in the sense like, “whoa is me” but they want others to feel their pain. Sad in a sense where they want everyone to always stoop down to their level. Sad in a sense where they are so miserable that they can’t help  but just be mean and miserable. Actually I want to rephrase that, they chose to be mean/miserable. Their actions and attitude affect how they treat people and it usually results in someone like me, cutting them off… and not right away. It takes me a minute to see how the actions y’all display aren’t in my best interest to help me flourish/and our friendship.

I’ve experienced more than one mean girl, and I’m over y’all. Just a quick mini rant, as per usual, I’m the nicest/kind-hearted/self-less individual any person could have in a friend like me. I understand sometimes people aren’t always aware of their actions.. but it can’t be every time. Or even, if I’m telling you what you said bothered me you should be able to correct your behavior so we can move forward.

I really do feel bad for you Regina George. Your insecurities, and your life experiences have made you mean. It’s not fair to me. Whatever you have going on, good or bad, doesn’t give you the right to just treat people how you want to treat people. Someone should’ve told you about your behavior years ago.  It truly does boggle my mind that someone could have been through so much heart ache that they internalize all this hurt and anger. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not saying that every time you encounter someone you’re mean, but the few occasions you’ve spewed your hatred, it’s been at an unnecessary time and it could’ve been prevented.

I’m the friend that likes to talk things out, when both parties are calm and not hot-headed. Trust me I can be like you, but the difference with me is that I have a heart and I truly feel bad when I am mean to someone. My mother has always said I’m the most forgiving person, but I cannot excuse or let you just treat me any kind of way. I don’t understand how I can go through traumatic things in my life and not be like you Regina.

Regina, I wish you the best. There aren’t any hard feelings on my end. When I see you if I see you I’ll speak but I am not going to entertain you any longer. Our relationship has sizzled away and I do not care nor do I feel sorry for the actions you’ve continuously displayed. Good luck in all your future endeavors. I will no longer entertain your sad sad attitude. You do not get an invitation to be part of my life anymore.

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a stolen life; My Thoughts Memoir.

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a stolen life by Jaycee Dugard was suggested to me by a co-worker. She gave me a list of books to read that she deemed as ‘deep’ and ‘heart-wrenching’ so I gave it a chance. Reading the back of the book (fun fact: also known as the blurb) caught my eye. For anyone who hasn’t yet heard of this book it’s about a young girl who was kidnapped and held captive for eighteen years.

a stolen life, thus far, has been the hardest book to read because of the real, honest, and gut turning details Jaycee writes about. Every page I turned there was a detail I couldn’t handle, or something I wasn’t expecting her to say. Jaycee’s story is sad, but also inspiring. She makes it a point to discuss her life pre, post, and present her captivity.

Whenever I picked up my book I would read a whole chapter if I could. Again, somethings were graphic and I couldn’t take my brain to those dark places for too long. Yes the book was a great one, but honestly, I couldn’t imagine ever going through something so horrific as Jaycee did. Something so traumatic as this changes you.

We hear about stories of children, families, relatives, or maybe sometimes people we know being kidnapped. Some come home and some don’t. Jaycee was very lucky.

She says, “On August 26, 2009, I took my name back. My name is Jaycee Lee Dugard. I don’t think of myself as a victim, I simply survived an intolerable situation.”

What’s different about this book is that throughout Jaycee gives reflection moments. In certain chapters there’s a focus on how she felt during specific instances in her life during captivity. Earlier I mentioned her story being inspiring, and it is because you see the growth she experiences because of it.  Like she stated, she didn’t see herself as the victim. Jaycee always seemed to have this free spirit about her, she always seemed hopeful.

Her story is unique and I can only hope no other family has to go through what hers has. While her story is unfortunate she has done some great things afterwards. She has overcome obstacles and has started her life over.

Below is her foundation she has started, one of the many positives that has come from a horrible situation.

Check out her website. I hope you enjoyed her book as much as I did.

Her foundation is The JAY C Foundation Inc. http://thejaycfoundation.org/

STRESS QUEEN !

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I literally stress about everything. I can’t tell you how many miles a minute my brain is constantly moving. If things don’t go my way (how I planned it in my head)…STRESS, if I pile a crap ton of stuff on my never ending to- do list…STRESS, if I can’t figure something out (like how it took me a minute to add website links, and I still couldn’t figure it out so they’re attached below)…MORE STRESS, if something is not working…STRESS. The list literally goes on…forever. I have figured out how to cope with it, and stress less, but they’re minuscule baby steps; I’m a constant work in progress.

Lets take a few steps back to the beginning of this year. This was “my year,” to do all the great things. The year of less stress, writing more, publish my book (which is currently out on Amazon and Barnes and Noble) Pieces of Me: A Collection of Poems and Short Stories. I just wanted to be more confident in myself and do what makes Jordan happy than prior years. So, one day while at church the youth mime team did a performance to a song called You Will Win by Jekalyn Carr. The message was powerful and the performance was just as great. Of course, after that Sunday service I felt rejuvenated and ready to take on the world. I downloaded the song on my phone, and I told myself this would be one thing (of many) to relieve my stress. Writing always helps although sometimes I’m not in the mood or I have writers block. I sometimes use my fidget cube/spinner, or I just sit in the dark breathe and count until I’ve calmed myself down. For this song, I made the decision to let it be my motivation, something to use as a pick me up when things weren’t right for whatever reason.

The words to the song help me so much because it relaxes me. It also confirms for me that I will win; I can’t always stress and worry about things I can’t control. It is very hard for me to just let things go, or cope with not having things work out the way I planned. Somethings are just out of my control. It helps me to remember that I can’t identify as this strong person but always feel ‘defeated’ or that whatever blessings that are meant for me won’t come; or that I get myself into such a stressful tizzy that I have to use one of the above tools to calm me down. I’m the type of person who worries a lot too. I can’t try to be this strong person but always be a stressed Sally. I’ll be pulling too much energy trying to keep a happy medium. I need to constantly remind myself that whatever I set my mind out to do I WILL WIN at that task.

“I know you’re hurt
I know you’re torn
I know you’re broken but
You will win.

It’s my winning season
(It’s my winning season)
Everything attached to me wins
Everything attached to me wins
Everything attached to me wins
(Everything attached to me wins)”

There is a point in Jekalyn’s song where she says “You can’t say you are a winner but look defeated.” Out of the entire song, that one line is probably one of the most influential. I can’t be a strong warrior, a black queen, but let the small or big things get to me. I have to take a breath and remind myself that things will be okay.

I have to remind myself, and you should too: I will win. I will not be defeated. If I need to dust myself off I will. If I need to take a minute and regroup I can.

I will win. I can’t call myself a winner but look defeated. Everything attached to me wins.

Below is the song in case you’d like to listen, and attached is the link to purchase my book.

https://www.amazon.com/Pieces-Me-Collection-Poems-Stories/dp/0692086595/ref=sr_1_2?ie=UTF8&qid=1527554476&sr=8-2&keywords=jordan+freels&dpID=51O-m7x4BIL&preST=_SY291_BO1,204,203,200_QL40_&dpSrc=sr

 

A Helping Hand.

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Asking for help is one of the hardest things for me to do. I hate feeling like I have to depend on people, it makes me feel less than. Yes, I understand sometimes people need help from others in certain areas, or for certain things, but for me it’s more personal. It’s a tight corner I’ve backed myself into. Asking for help makes me feel like I’m incapable of doing things for me.

I also couple it with how I always hear, “Oh you look so young” or “you look like a student” while that’s great to know as I get older I’ll still be perceived as younger (inserts straight face emoji) it doesn’t make me feel like a young adult woman. I am not complaining that I’ve been blessed with youthful genes, or that I am in a rush to look so old. I just couple the generous compliments with me thinking/perceiving these compliment givers think I can’t do for myself because of my youthfulness. Call me crazy. I realize to that end I shouldn’t worry about what others think or perceive of me, and I must say I have gotten way better at not caring anymore or feeling the need to explain myself. This year has been a huge season of growth for me in more than one area. *Ends mini rant.*

Point two in asking for help. If I have a vision and want something done a certain way it is very hard for me to be patient, have my mind changed, or even feel like whomever I’m asking for help from will exceed my expectations of what and how I want things to be done. In a nut shell, I usually feel better doing things my way because I know if I fail it’s no ones fault but mine. I also understand that I don’t know everything and asking for someones opinion is because again, I’m no expert. I’m a firm believer that if you ask for help it’s because you need it, but I also understand just because I am asking for help doesn’t mean I have to agree or do the advice given. It’s funny because in the same breath I ask for help,  it’s because I think/feel their suggestion will be better. It’s like, why ask for advice if you’re not going to do what was suggested? (Which by the way is a super pet peeve of mine). Don’t ask for help if you don’t want it. I sure am preaching to myself!

Moral of the story, you aren’t an expert at everything. Ask for help because you need it or you wouldn’t be asking in the first place. Take the time to acknowledge the help given, but don’t belittle, discredit, ignore, or for all the other reasons I’ve listed above, not feel like you can’t do because you’re asking for aid. A helping hand is something everyone needs. Even me. Even when I feel like asking for help makes me feel less adult-like. It’s hard wearing your big girl panties everyday but still understanding you can’t do it all yourself. No one can.

Get your own #RelationshipGoals

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What is it about how society portrays relationship goals that makes the rest of us think that’s what our relationships should be?

I can’t be the only one who loves to see those random videos of couples we don’t know confess their love for each other and re-post them. Or the videos from Valentines Day where the guy has a ton of flowers and balloons every where. You know, the cliche-esq  photos and videos that we wished our spouses did for us. I can admit I love love, and I have reposted those same videos and pictures myself. The best ones are engagement videos. I get teary-eyed, and hope and pray my future husband does something ten times better. But, why?

I think for some people they share their love story because they want others to know that true love does exist. The issue for me becomes when people try to copy what they’ve seen; or they try to match what celebrities show as their relationship goals. Be original, or just be boring. Let the love story be yours, and let it be unique. Who cares what others may have to say about you and your spouse, or if it doesn’t get reposted and goes viral. It’s your relationship, not theirs. If you have a million snap chat pictures with filters as your year anniversary then post it and be proud! Or if you’ve taken the time to have this elaborate photo shoot with dolphins, and flowers, and the sun glistening down on you and your spouse then that’s great too.

Be your own relationship goals. It’s okay to want  to have something like someone else, but not everything that glitters is gold. Understand that no relationship is perfect, and while you and I may love love no relationship is always sunshine and daises. You realize people only post the ‘good’ and never the ‘bad.’ We don’t see when couples argue, or things aren’t going how they should in the relationship. We emulate the good and forget that there is bad sometimes sprinkled in there too.

Take the time to build a relationship and chose to share with others because you want to, not because you think it’s what society thinks should happen. The best relationships are the ones where no one knows you and your spouses business. I’ve said it before, not everything is for social media. But, if you chose to post, let it be genuine and real.

Don’t do what society shows us what relationship goals are. Create your own and let that be your foundation. Don’t build your foundation on what you see others have. Every relationship and every spouse is different.

 

Get your own #relationshipgoals.

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Listen less and Grow more.

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Have you ever felt like the people around you never have anything positive to say? Or people just don’t understand the things you have going on in your life? I know I have. I’ve learned that it’s okay that people won’t understand the things you have going on in your life, or why you chose to do things you do, but it sure can be burdensome or draining when you think you’re doing well and someone tries to knock you down. This goes for whoever is in your life that may not be giving you the advice you should be hearing. Not what they think you need to hear because it’s the advice they think you need. There is a difference, trust me.

I’m the type of person who always want to please everyone, but even now I’m learning that if what I’m doing someone doesn’t like, or they aren’t helping me grow then I need to keep them as far away from me as possible. Remember, you are your worst critic, and essentially are the only one stopping you from growing. If you continuously beat yourself up for not being where you want to be because you’re listening to others then you are never going to grow. Sometimes listening to other people will only put you in a state of mind where you start listening to what they have to say, and whose to say that the advice their giving you is correct? Please stop doing that. Everything you do doesn’t have to have to be validated by other people. If you didn’t ask anyone for advice, and even if it’s something that you think isn’t the best choice for you don’t listen to them.

Live your life. Make the decision you think is best for you. Call on people who you know will give you advice that is sound, valuable, and honest. You’re at a point in your life where you should be even if it seems like things may not always be going so great. What is for you is meant for you, and what is meant for someone else is for them. That’s another thing, stop comparing what you have or where you are to someone else’s life. If you need to change somethings in your life then by all means do so. You can’t grow by listening to what other people have to say all the time. They don’t live your life, they don’t know what you’ve been through, they don’t know how much you’ve changed.

Essentially, all that matters is the decisions you make for yourself. Don’t misconstrue what I’m not saying. I’m not saying isolate yourself and just live under a rock. All I’m saying is know the difference between having someone support, uplift, and help you grow, verses tearing you down and you thinking that their helping you when their only hurting you.